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Friday, April 11, 2014

excerpt below from mental health site...

Ask Dr. SchwartzAsk Dr. Schwartz:
Psychotherapy and Mental Health questions

Personality Disorder or Just a Horrible Person

Sat, Dec 21st 2013



Dear Dr. Schwartz,
I have been married for 15 years and for 13 of those my mother-in-law had keys to our house. I loved & trusted her as she helped me a lot when my children were young. However, I realised she was stealing my things. Over the years she has taken kitchen knives, expensive linen, my grandmothers crochet tablecloth, bath towels, coasters, alcohol, platters and other household goods.I used to see things at her home and think she just used to go out and buy the same items, e.g. a white platter, for example, until I noticed that my white linen tablecloth was on her dining table. She has also given my grandmothers crochet tablecloth to her daughter as a wedding gift.
I have confronted her with this and there is always some explanation e.g. that her employer brought back the white linen tablecloth from Hong Kong for her as a gift. Also, after I confronted her about it, she started putting all my things that she had taken over the years, on show, e.g. my knives on her kitchen bench, my drink coasters on her coffee table.
She is also a compulsive liar. She does have money and can afford to buy these things for herself, but does not like to spend money. She lives like a miser. She attends Church every Sunday and appears to be an upstanding citizen. She does not have any long term friendships. I thought I was the luckiest person on earth to have such a great & helpful motherinlaw until I discovered she was stealing from our house. Now I don't want to even be in the same room as her. Is there some sort of explanation for her behaviour? I thought if I can work out why she has done this it will help me deal with it.

Allan Schwartz, LCSW, Ph.D. Responds
I don't know if your mother-in-law has a personality disorder or not. Either way, she, in your terms, could be a "horrible person." Not everyone with a personality disorder is horrible and not everyone who is free from this disorder is nice.
Many years ago, working in the hospitals, we used to say that "mental illness is no excuse for bad behavior. Except for those who are so mentally ill or delusional that they cannot decipher right from wrong, people know what is ethical and not. After all, she goes to Church, which by itself, indicates a sense of moral thinking.
Having said all of this, she might have some type of mental illness. There are those who have a compulsion to hoard. In that case, people pick up and save garbage, shop compulsively and save what they buy, steal and save the stolen items and etc. There are those who compulsively steal things, know it's wrong and cannot stop.
I assume that you have discussed this with your husband and have decided how you want to deal with the problem. If not, the two of you need to discuss this problem and decide upon a reasonable approach. I assume you want your grandmother's table cloth back. However, its important that the two of you are united on this thing and in agreement, even if that agreement means doing nothing.
Best of Luck

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

More violence in our schools....

/be sane'.

this time it's Pennsylvania, small town. Kid comes in hacking people with knife. What? no metal detectors? come on people get with the program and update your security in school, work, malls. Also make mental health a priority. Increase funding so people who need help, get it. Write your congressman now.You mean to tell me no one knew this kid was in trouble? how did he get by security guard when entered school with two knives? How come security guard couldn't defend himself and do something to help prevent this?

Dr. Brene Brown's vulnerability

'be sane.'

at Ted Talks. Good stuff. click here for video.

Monday, April 7, 2014

Friday, April 4, 2014

Another shooting..

'stay or get sane'.

opens our eyes to the need for providing affordable mental health treatment for all. Yes, 'insanity' is overrated or rather, not making this a prioriy is just plain stupid. In these stressful, economically taxing times with foreclosures due to job loss, the break down of the nuclear family, wide spread divorce, depression, isolation due to technology and it's fast pace, warring nations, crime, violence and so on..We are put upon daily in countless ways, bombarded by all this stimuli. Easing our minds is an oasis and answer.  How do we do this? Try affordable ways and not just paying a shrink for  100 an hour. Yoga, meditation, deep stretching, breathing, juicing, walking, biking, listening to calming music, swimming, going for a stroll in the woods, hanging with  our pets, minimizing cluttering, letting go of some of our possessions that really possess us  are all possible options. 'here's to your health!'

read more here.  on fort hood and handling traumatic situations like this.

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Why I hate psyche meds...

watch now.

Use Lumosity to train yiour brain..

'be sane'.

and keep it healthy, agile. Cognitive games, skills learned, maintained like for memory, awareness of things going on at same time, finding differences in say a group of pix and similarities.

Just came out of an online mental health chat on Bipolar World. Felt attacked. Moderator booted me and the let me back in. All said was not good to be reactive but to act. was told didn't know him and how was lecturing and a troll and so forth by the group. Felt unwelcomed. typical of this type of room and a mental one in particular given the people thee who are unstable. what do you think? has this happened to you in a chat, forum online?

All I did rather than respond and 'bug out' is deep breath and say 'be still' and was calmer as felt self getting hurt, worked up so is my responsibility to work it down and be sane not nutty, reactive blown about by the winds of life.

Recovery Journey

Addiction ,Desperation ,Fear ,Hate, self Hatred,

Expectations, greed, lust, lack of self control,

dependence, neediness sadness, manipulation

,enablement to clear boundaries ,learning to say'no'

,self love, acceptance, respect,

assertiveness ,independence ,faith, discipline

My meditation video

In it I share how to do it,what kind of meditation this is,where to find out more info on it,the benefits of meditation and so on..Hope it helps you. :)